Hi, friends. Time for a mental health check-in.
It’s been six months since I started taking that little blue pill. Every night, 50 mg keeps my anxiety in check so I can function like a semi-normal person. What a blessing it has been.
I feel like I am able to enjoy my children, my husband, my life. Do I still get anxious sometimes? Heck, yes I do. But it’s not all-consuming. It doesn’t keep me in the house, afraid of what is waiting on the outside.
It doesn’t keep me up at night (I have a teething baby that does that for me). It doesn’t hold me back from pursuing my dreams, no matter how hard it tries to doubt me.
For the first time in a long time, I feel like my anxiety doesn’t control me.
But it hasn’t been easy. I miss coffee. Coffee and moms go hand in hand. I mean, for someone who is still only sleeping a couple hours at a time, how cruel is it that I can’t even get an energy boost from a warm cup of coffee in the morning?
Since I no longer drink regular coffee, I’ve been trying to fill that void with diet soda that past couple weeks. And it shows.
Between the stresses of work, life, and a grumpy teething baby, I’ve leaned on diet soda to be my crutch. So I’ve seen a resurgence of anxiety. I’ve also been ignoring my water intake, which has ultimately led to me feeling like crap. Dehydration causes fatigue so I’ve put myself in this vicious circle of being exhausted and needing an energy boost to further dehydrating myself.
So the truth is I haven’t been taking good care of myself in recent days, and that’s on me. I can’t expect this little pill to fix every part of my life. It’s a supplement. I need to remember that I need to take care of myself physically to help take care of myself mentally.
This is my reminder to do better.