Free Falling into Fall

Free Falling into Fall

I’m still coming off the hell that was last week with both kids sick. And I’m missing coffee more than ever.

The three year old finally returned to sleeping through the night in his bed without waking up screeching multiple times a night.

The baby is making progress. He’s still congested and coughs at night, waking him up more than his typical twice per night. The unfortunate drainage down his throat at night has caused him to gag and spew his recently guzzled milk in the middle of the night. Usually it’s just a little hiccup. Last night, it was Old Faithful.

I laid him back in his bassinet next to my bed after feeding him and letting him lay on my lap for a few minutes. Once in his bassinet, he squirmed around a little bit trying to get back to sleep. Then the coughing started. Then there was a brief pause of silence followed by the sound of a wet explosion.

I quickly sat up and switched on the lamp. Milk was all over his face, coming out of his nose, leaking down behind his head. I cleaned up poor bubbs and changed his clothes before returning him back to bed.

Needless to say, I’m exhausted. It is on days like these that I am grateful for my anxiety medication. Because I know without it, I would be a wreck. The perpetual poor sleep I am getting, combined with the stresses of everyday life would no doubt leave me a hopeless mass of anxiety if unmedicated. I am truly happy about a tiny little pill.

It’s been kind of a wave of emotions the past week. Along with little people not feeling well, we learned that our beloved infant teacher at daycare will be leaving for another job next week.

We have known her for several years, ever since my first son was a baby. I was ecstatic when I learned that my new son would have her as an infant teacher. One thing I’ve learned about having children in daycare is how hard it is to find a caregiver to connect with and really like, especially in an industry that sees a good amount of turnover.

To say I’m bummed is an understatement. Obviously I support her doing what is best for her life. But it’s made me contemplate other options such as switching centers or even coming up with a way to bribe her to be our nanny. A mom’s gotta do what a mom’s gotta do. Again, I am grateful for my medication because without it, I realize I would be at a much more frantic state.

So I’ve been feeling a little floaty (yes, made up word) lately. I need to refocus myself and be more mindful of living in the present. It’s just hella hard when you’re tired as heck.

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